Wednesday, October 10, 2012

WTF Politics: Scary Sarah Spice

Do these jeans make me look fat?
If you know me (or happened to come upon the 'about' section of this blog), you are well aware there is no love lost between me and the former half Governor of the great state of Alaska. Well, to be more accurate, Sarah couldn't identify me from a pound of moose meat, but she has been the arch nemesis in my head ever since John McCain thrust her and her brood on to the national political scene during the 2008 election. Immediately, without even having the benefit of seeing HBO's 'Game Change' nearly four years later, Sarah and Co. simply rubbed me the wrong way. Sure, the kids were cute but their mother seemed woefully unprepared for the enormous job she was campaigning for and generally uninterested in changing anyone's negative perception if untrue. I also credit her - in no small part - with the creation of 'Birtherism' and other lies and untruths that would become part of the eventual platform of the made-up nearly now defunct, Tea Party. Unable to win a presidential election fair and square, Sarah decided she would paint the country's first black President as 'other':  A foreign, dark-skinned, likely Muslim, unlikely American citizen who "palled around with terrorists." Awesome.

Post election, what soon became apparent is that Governor Palin had very little interest in governin', and way more interest in parlaying her failed bid for the Vice Presidency into a career in entertainment. The snow had barely melted in Alaska before Sarah resigned as Governor less than six months after President Obama was inaugurated in January 2009. Citing "family needs" and "ethics probes", it seemed those needs included each Palin having their individual shot at that elusive '15 fifteen minutes of fame'. In the interest of time, here's an incomplete list of some of the Palin Family's Greatest Hits:

  • To the surprise of no one everyone, Sarah signs a multi-year deal to become a contributor to non-partisan Fox News;
  • Daughter, Bristol, becomes a contestant on ABC's 'Dancing With The Stars', the reality show with the loosest interpretation of  the word 'stars' in a generation;
  • TLC takes us inside the mind of the former Governor and the interior of the 49th state with 'Sarah Palin's Alaska';
  • Bristol would also star in Lifetime's 'Bristol Palin: Life's a Tripp' (indeed) with her adorable son, Tripp (get it?). The show featured her two younger sisters who could not be blamed if they resented Bristol for her sudden and singular leap into celebritydom. Poor Willow and Piper are basically forced to play Rebbie and LaToya to Bristol's Janet.
  • Bristol Baby Daddy, Levi Johnston, would even parlay the failed election into a string of infamous brushes with pseduo celebrity, including television appearances, numerous magazine covers, a Playgirl spread, a date with Kathy Griffin and most notably, a half-hearted attempt to follow in his once future mother-in-law's footsteps by becoming Mayor of Wasilla, Alaska.
  • Not to be outdone, Todd Palin, the former 'First Dude' (his idea, not mine), got into the action with yet another reality show named, 'Stars Earn Stripes'. (For the love of God, can anyone identify what a 'star' is anymore?)  Here, Todd teamed up with Nick Lachey to help Jessica Simpson lose the baby weight. Wait, that doesn't sound right. Let Me Google That For You.
  • If you were concerned, extended family were not left out in the cold. Recently, Sarah's father and brother co-authored a book about the shy, reclusive, virtually unknown Palin family titled Made in Alaska. (I'm sensing a theme here.)
  • Noted lover of the written word, Governor Palin penned two bestsellers, Going Rogue: An American Life and later, America by Heart. Finally, just yesterday, in these last weeks of the hotly contested 2012 presidential election where Palin is just four years removed from seeking the office of Vice President herself, Sarah announced that she is authoring a book on foreign relations fitness!

Which may answer a lot of questions about her appearance when caught by paparazzi while walking about LA's Studio City this past Sunday. Looking fashionably Unicef slim in wedge heels and skinny jeans, Sarah looked every bit the Stateswoman. She's basically a modern Madeline Albright, if you will. Yet, when I stared at the photo, I couldn't help but to imagine Posh Spice out of the shot offering Sarah a sandwich, standing beside Kim Kardashian who was warning Sarah about the dangers of media overexposure.

Sarah Palin for President 2016!

4 comments:

  1. I saw these photos on Celebitchy (don't judge) yesterday and between the bad highlights, the skinny jeans, the off the shoulder...thingy, and the heels... Oy! This woman is 48. She is a former governor and VP nominee (thanks again, McCain). Has she no friends? SOMEONE to say, "Girlfriend, no. NO." What am I saying? She has the maturity of a 13 yr old. She would respond with a, "you're jus jealous!! 11!!!1"

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  2. Love the post! Honestly...if you google the definitions for sociopath and narcissist, she hits all the marks. No remorse, no humility or self-reflection whatsoever...

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    1. Hang on! Let Me Google That For You! lol

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